Hidden

The hidden behind what the eye initially sees is an ongoing theme for me. As days extend and time stretches here in the languid lushness of the jungle, I can feel my senses sharpening and everyday something new reveals itself to me.

When I first arrived in Nosara I could hear the the deep guttural growls of the Howler Monkeys everywhere I went, but I could not see them through the layers of verdant vegetation. Then one day as I was just sitting in my small studio, looking out at nothing in particular, an entire family of frisky howlers appeared before me, methodically picking and eating the leaves off of a nearby tree. Ever since then I see them everywhere, everyday. It's almost like I've been sprinkled with magic dust so that I can see things no one else can; lizards camouflaging themselves in a perfect shade of brown to mimic the hand-hewn logs holding up the corrugated plastic shelter at the Surf Dog Cafe, tiny ants in a line carrying neon green leaves twice their size to an undisclosed location, bright red crabs hiding in the brush on the beach path, the growing of the plants outside my door after 24 hours of rain.

Yesterday I went to the beach during high tide and walked south for as far as I could. The waves were coming in fast and choppy, the sky clear and blue with no sign of approaching afternoon showers and I had the beach all to myself. When I turned around I noticed the tide had receded and there ahead of me were my beloved tide pools. The were completely submerged just an hour ago and now ready for me to soak in the calm waters resting in the stone.

Most every night after I climb up into my comfy loft and turn the light off, my ears begin tuning in to the sounds of the jungle at night. I'm not so enamored with some of theses sounds because they are the sounds of creatures who are scuffling around on the rooftop right above my bed and sometimes it sounds like they are inside my casa. Last night as I was reading on my little couch before bed, a little black creature scurried in and disappeared. I was comforted only by the fact that in no way could this creature make its way up my ladder and into my bed! I do feel safe and before my eyes close I gaze out into the night as my vision adjusts to the darkness and I listen to the monkeys, rain and wind in the trees.

Things hidden can be frightening or enlightening depending on how you look at them. Tuning in to all of the frequencies around me I am opening myself to a world of possibility and in that opening I am also vulnerable. It scares me sometimes but then I think of all the things I would miss, heartbreak and healing, monkeys and tide pools.